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Look at us… the picture perfect couple. Love in both of our eyes and seemingly happiness in our hearts. But behind this picture you don’t see the mental abuse I suffered from the person I loved the most. You don’t see the bruises and bloody noses. Behind this picture you don’t see the unhappiness in his heart… the contempt the anger… you don’t see the other girls he was with or the way he talked to them… you don’t see the pain in my heart and the holes in my soul. You don’t see my mind and self esteem breaking down slowly with every move he made. You don’t see what he had planned for me…. I don’t see that he’s capable of choking me or having someone beat me up in my own home….
Why? Why kedric…. why did you take away the only place I felt safe… why did you have someone in my bed and smile at me when you saw the pain on my face. Why did you make me feel like I was all alone in such a big world. Why did you have me beat? You see… I loved you… everything in me loved you. I had stars in my eyes when I looked at you and took care of you to the best of my ability so why?? Why did you tell me you didn’t want to be associated with me? Why did you reject me and embarrass me? Why did you hate me so much? I’ll never ever understand why? What did I do wrong? Was it the way I laughed? The way I looked or how I was concerned about you when you weren’t home? Was it the trust issues and the need for your love? What was it that made you hate me so much?

